As someone surrounded by friends and relatives who love numbers more than chocolate, I don’t buy the story that accounting jokes are nonexistent and accountant humor is in my imagination. Nope. Not one bit.
Unlike the ridiculous stereotypes, the accounting professionals in my midst are calm, composed and methodical. They have such internal controls, they're never, ever unbalanced. When I ask how many accountants it takes to change a light bulb, one will say, let me run a few numbers and get back to you, quickly concluding: It takes one accountant to do the work and one to make sure it was done within budget.
You might say that accountant humor contributes to success on the job. In a Robert Half survey, CFOs were asked whether their employees' sense of humor helped them fit into the company culture. Twenty-two percent of them said a funny bone was very important, and 56 said it was somewhat important. That adds up to 78 percent of them giving a nod to jokes all around!
If you need to find someone with a sense of humor — either to hire or to work for — learn more about our services!
I’ve taken it upon myself to gather a few examples of accountant humor — eight accounting jokes and four more accounting cartoons — and share them here, stopping short of putting them on spreadsheets. If you’re a manager, try out a joke on your team, and if you’re an employee or job candidate, take a break to read this. If you can relate or find something funny, go ahead and laugh out loud!
From the work-life equilibrium files
1. How do you know when an accountant is on vacation
He doesn’t wear a tie and comes in after 8 a.m.
2. An accountant is having a hard time sleeping and goes to see his doctor. "Doctor, I just can't get to sleep at night," he says. "Have you tried counting sheep?" asks the doctor. "That's the problem — I make a mistake and then spend six hours trying to find it."
3. What’s an accountant's favorite brand of cereal?
Laugh more with a dose of work-life balance for accounting and finance professionals.
Chips off the old block
4. How do you know if your son is going to be a CPA?
When you read him the story of Cinderella and get to the part where the pumpkin turns into a golden carriage, and he asks, “Is that ordinary income, or a capital gain?”
5. You might be a tax accountant if ...
... you refer to your child as Deduction 214.
6. An accountant, after reading a nursery rhyme to his child, says, "No, son. It wouldn't be tax deductible when Little Bo Peep loses her sheep. But I like your thinking."
Take the money and run
7. What do you call a trial balance that doesn't balance?
A late night.
8. A young accountant fresh out of college is interviewed by the owner of a small business. “I need someone with an accounting degree,” says the man. “But mainly I’m looking for someone to do my worrying for me. I have lots of things to worry about, but I want someone else to worry about money matters.”
“OK,” says the accountant. “How much are you offering?”
“You can start at $75,000 a year,” says the owner.
“That’s a great salary!” says the young accountant. “How can a business like yours afford to pay so much?”
“That,” says the man, “is your first worry.”
No joke: There's more
Want to find out the 5 Secrets of Workplace Humor in Accounting and Finance? While you're there, be sure to scroll to our slideshow of accounting cartoons and save a few to share with people who can appreciate them.
Aside from the one-liners and puns that were shared with us, we found these and other jokes at Business Insider, the Alternate Accountant, Jokes 4 Us, Crush the CPA Exam and The Accountant’s (Bad) Joke Book.
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