Resumania™: Comparing Yourself to Cheese Won't Impress Employers

Authors often use analogies to paint more detailed pictures and deepen a reader’s understanding. By making comparisons between different people or objects, writers can spotlight similarities, adding both clarity and flavor to a piece of writing.

But be careful with who — or what — you compare yourself to when you’re applying for a job. What you think will be funny or clever might come across as weird, confusing or unprofessional to a prospective employer. Consider these odd comparisons:

COVER LETTER: “I guess you can call me ‘Chameleon’ because like that lizard, I can adapt.”

A candidate who’s hiding his true colors.

COVER LETTER: “I am more powerful than Limburger.”

The world’s cheesiest analogy.

COVER LETTER: “I’m like a split personality, so put both my Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde to work for you.”

We might take Dr. Jekyll, but you can keep Mr. Hyde.

COVER LETTER: “If the company I work for is a fine 1967 Shelby Mustang, and the company president is the driver, and the engineers and managers are the twin turbo engine, then I am the synthetic oil that makes the car run smoothly and efficiently.”

We're not “racing” to call this candidate.

COVER LETTER: “You give me a metaphorical pile of wood, and like a carpenter I’ll build you a success stairway to climb to the top.”

That’s quite an elevator pitch.

COVER LETTER: “Like a spaceship, I shoot for the moon (but without the clunky gear and the exciting launch).”

You haven't rocketed to the top of our list.

Have you seen any good resume or cover letter goofs? Send examples to [email protected]. 

Is It Worth Writing a Clever Resume?