Resumania™: And the Award for Worst Resume “Honors” Section Goes To …

All honors are not equal. For example, being named your company’s “Employee of the Year” will likely impress prospective employers; winning a neighborhood poker tournament probably won’t hold as much weight. Many applicants make the mistake of including so-called honors and accomplishments in their resumes that are dated or irrelevant to the job they’re seeking.

While certain achievements may serve as personal points of pride, you need to think about what’s likely to impress a hiring manager.

These job candidates should have focused on more professionally pertinent honors:

“AWARDS: Pepsi Recipient.”

Our office vending machine hands out the same “award.”

“ACCOMPLISHMENTS: Showed up to work.”

Attendance is more of a basic requirement than an accomplishment.

“NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENTS: When I was nine years old, I started a neighborhood newspaper staffed entirely by the grade school kids I played with every day. They went on strike after a few weeks, and I edited the paper myself until it folded.”

The rise and fall of a mini media mogul.

“AWARDS/ACCOMPLISHMENTS: Dum major with my high school band.”

Don’t be so hard on yourself.

“ACHIEVEMENTS: Made dean’s list in 1987.”

Anything a little more recent than that?

“ACCOMPLISHMENTS: Can run circles around my peers because I am not tethered to my phone, email, Facebook or any electronic device.”

Our reply to your application is in the mail.

“AWARDS: Won first place at my middle school’s annual science fair.”

We’re guessing you wowed the judges with an erupting volcano.

Have you seen any good resume or cover letter goofs? Send examples to [email protected].

Resumania™: Comparing Yourself to Cheese Won't Impress Employers
Resumania™: Avoid Including odd Affiliations